2008 didn’t suck. I did some cool stuff. I did some stuff that sucked. I didn’t do some other stuff.

Here’s some of the cool stuff that I did:

• I got back on the horse, and started up my court case again. It’s in progress, folks, so soon, I may be able to go from being a totally broke crazy artist/shut-in type to being a slightly less broke one.
• I started running, and joined a running club.
• I started watching football regularly, and it went well. I even won one of my fantasy football leagues, and placed second in the other.
• I read more books than I have in a long time, but still not quite enough.
• I watched a lot of movies, some even in the movie theater, which I don’t do usually. Amazing what one of them free movies on Tuesdays perks cards will do for a brother.
• I moved my club in Second Life twice, but it’s where it should be now, and you can fish there.
• I sold some of my stuff, and feel kind of OK about that.
• I’ve just about phased out the use of music CDs in daily life.
• I finally, after years of not putting a concerted effort into doing so, bought myself some new clothes.
• Despite being broke, I juggled resources around and got a little closer to finishing my bucket list of “stupid things I’d like to own before I die, so my heirs, if any, can be confused by them and have no idea what to do with them”.
• I also managed to see Nicole Atkins (twice), Van Halen, Iron Maiden, Killdozer, The Butthole Surfers, and Gibby Haynes solo, performing the works of the Butthole Surfers with the assistance of the Paul Green School Of Rock All-Stars (who also performed at the full Butthole Surfers show) over the course of the year. Most of these shows, I attended thanks to the generosity of others, who know who they are.
• I invested some of my meager savings in the stock market (around a hundred bucks, nothing huge), and with a notable exception here and there, I’m doing OK, even in these fuck-awful financial times.
• I met Ron Guidry, Dwight Gooden and George Shuba in Cooperstown, and I also got to have a brief, but enlightening discussion with Graig Nettles about Artie Lange.
• I watched Fidel step down and Barack step up.
• On that note, I also applied for a job in the Obama-Biden administration, which hopefully won’t mess with my court case. I did specifically say that I have a sleep disorder that prevents me from showing up anywhere on a regular basis in my application, so I think I’m OK there.
• Running counter to the “content should be everywhere” argument, I began the gradual removal of my writing and music from sites that I have ethical disagreements with. I’d rather have you folks visit me here anyway, because I know that if you do, you do it because you really want to, not because it’s convenient. Thanks for making the trip over.
• Despite my apprehension toward doing so these days, I performed in public very briefly, three times. Two of them don’t count because it was Best Buy and Rock Band II, but holy shit, did I rock the vocals on “Mountain Song” and “Man In The Box”.
• I passed the 10 years of not drinking mark. Save your chips, I’m good by myself.
• I got a copy of “Chinese Democracy”.
• I got to see some gay folks legally marry on the television, including George muthafuckin’ Takei. Hopefully, this Proposition 8 nonsense goes away soon and they don’t have to worry about being un-married by a bunch of kooks who think Britney Spears does a better job of preserving the sanctity of marriage than they do.
• I covered the NYC Marathon for the 8th consecutive year, and I even made friends with one of the folks I saw running it on the television this year. Thanks, Deb. You make me feel slightly better about the fact that Paul Tergat hasn’t added me back on Facebook yet. ;)

Here’s some of the stuff I did that sucked:

• I hurt my left shin while running after a month or two of running, and it nags the hell out of me. It doesn’t even really HURT. It just nags me.
• As I do every year, I had to write obituaries for way too many cool people. I’ll miss Gary Gygax, Albert Hofmann, George Carlin, Robert Hazard, Jerry Reed, Dock Ellis and many others whose obituaries I didn’t get around to writing.
• I had to listen to and look at Sarah Palin, the Clintons, and many other icky politicians way too much this year.
• As I do every year, I unfortunately had to distance myself from a handful of people who I feel are no good for me. I wish them no ill will and hope things go well for them, but for the preservation of my own quality of life, I needed to put them on the other side of the wall.
• I watched Yankee Stadium close. Man, fuck that noise. This new park better have little tongues built into the seats and be capable of reviving Yankee greats from the dead for all the trouble it’s caused.
• I had some migraines, a stomach virus, and probably at least one cold. I’ve gotta come up with a better plan for not having my head explode in November, because two out of the past three years, it has.

Here’s some of the stuff I didn’t do:

• I didn’t release my album yet.
• I’m not totally finished archiving all of my data. Most of it, yes, but not all of it.
• I didn’t get rich, or even get “not broke” yet.
• I didn’t fix my musical equipment that’s not working right. If I win my court case (and hopefully, I will, and promptly, but I’m not holding my breath yet), I may use a portion of the back check I’ll get to do this. Whether I’m sketched out by making music or not, having the tools to do so properly, even if they’re old, cheap tools that have been in use longer than some of you have been alive, is a quality of life issue for me.
• I didn’t figure out how to let go of grudges.
• I didn’t spend enough time in Philadelphia. I like that town.

There’s probably a bunch of other stuff in all of these categories, but I’ve gone on long enough.

For those wondering, I’ll keep it brief: this year, I hope to travel more, win a court case, run a marathon and outlive Jesus. If I outlive Jesus, I may even go to Disneyland.

Thanks for reading.

(Ron Asheton at Glastonbury 2007, photographer unknown.)

“When I was a young guy coming up, going to the Grande Ballroom every weekend, I got to see my heroes play. Jeff Beck, the Who, everyone. I didn’t want to be a fanboy, but I’d stand there and wait — ‘I just want to say hi, this was great.’ I saw them walk by me with blank stares like they were zombies. I said to myself, you know, if I ever make it, I’ve got at least one minute for everybody who wants to say something. So I talk to people, and that’s what’s exciting now.”

Thanks for the minute and the music, man. Whether the world got it or not, you helped change everything.

OK, onto a new year, enough of this fucking around.

5 minutes walking
1 minute jogging/1 minute walking x 6
5 minutes walking

Total time: 25 minutes (was supposed to be 22; have to figure out why my pace sucked, probably because I fail at counting.)
Total mileage: 1.33 miles

I went without my cell phone today, because it wasn’t charged. I absolutely hate to do that when I run, just in case, but I have to get back to work here. No pain until I was walking the last hill during my 5 minute walk home, and even that was minor and passed almost right away. Took my anti-inflammatory right after the run, so hopefully the swelling I spent weeks alleviating doesn’t come back in any real way. I feel slightly headachey, but that’s because I need to eat something I think, which I’ll do right after I shower. Tried out the track shorts underneath my jeans today. Didn’t make much of a difference, I don’t think, aside from making me feel like I was wearing tights. If I wear anything Lycra without an overgarment, I’m going to get arrested for indecent exposure, though. Holy male camel toe, or “camel tail”, as Seth calls it in “Superbad”. Yes, you all really needed to know how big my junk looks when I wear Lycra.

All in all, it wasn’t a pretty run, nor was it a long one (again, I figured it would be best to start from the beginning after the layoff; better to underdo it than to overdo it), but it was a run, and that’s the important part.

Onward to Wednesday, health permitting.

At least I’m not putting it out there in June this year.

To be frank, this was a pretty lean year for new music, especially new music by new artists. I looked, and didn’t find much. I wish I had, honestly, it’s not just me being a cranky old man who’s like “All that new shit sucks!”, and there are newer artists who are doing good things. They just released their albums in ‘07. There also wasn’t very much in the way of compelling heavy metal this year, which is kind of a drag. When I have to even half-consider Metallica for a list like this, the metal community’s been slacking.

Anyway, onto the list, which is no particular order, with brief comments if I can get a handle on that whole brevity thing, man.

Guns N’ Roses-Chinese Democracy:

and not just because it finally came out. I’ve really enjoyed this album a bunch. It’s not a perfect record (there are a couple of songs on it that aren’t up to the standards of the others), and if you were looking for “Appetite For Destruction” or even “Use Your Illusion”, you’re gonna be disappointed. I think Axl and his new band really did terrific work here, on the whole, and it’s a terrific hard rock record in a world that’s short of them these days.

The Killers-Day And Age:

I like this one a bunch more than “Sam’s Town”, their last one. It’s more relaxed, and not suffering from “Holy shit, we have to knock everyone on their asses with our second album!” syndrome. If the last one turned you off, it’s safe to come back now.

Pinky Beecroft And The White Russians-Somethin’ Somewhere Better:

I’ve written about this one at length here, and it’s holding up very well. I really hope this record makes it out of Australia (and does well there too), because it’s really a worthwhile listen that’s grown on me with each listen. The songs land anywhere from clever to anthemic, and that’s a tough range to pull off. Good job, Pinky and co., and I look forward to hearing more.

Grace Jones-Hurricane:

everyone’s favorite really scary woman returns from a long absence, and releases the record Massive Attack didn’t get around to releasing this year. Good to have you back, Grace! Now do that crazy snarl for us!

The Cure-4:13 Dream:

here’s where I make all the sp00kypants types in the audience cry. I think this is a terrific record, and if you’re a Cure fan and you don’t, fuck you. No, it’s not “Disintegration Of Pornographic Bloodflowers in Seventeen Seconds”, but neither are about a dozen of their other albums. Musically, this is Robert Smith doing a pretty straightforward pop/rock record, and the band and production are totally on point. Lyrically, Robert’s still singing about being old, on drugs, and having one night stands, which he’s been doing for a ways now, but I don’t think anyone’s expecting him to suddenly start writing about social injustice or Jesus or anything. He writes what he knows. He’s in good voice, which is pretty remarkable considering how unorthodox his vocal style is, and considering that he is old, probably on drugs, and more than likely, having one night stands a lot. Really, I can’t find too much wrong with this album. People have given way less shit to artists who’ve put out bad late-period albums (I’m looking at you, Nick Cave), but because this is The Cure, and Robert has “Disintegration” to live up to, this record’s getting unfairly shit all over, despite being a really solid effort in my view. Give it a shot with an open mind, if you’ve been avoiding it because of all the whining people have done about it.

Portishead-Third:

I’ll confess, I haven’t listened to this one a lot in the second half of this year, but I enjoyed it plenty when it came out. It’s actually closer in style to Beth Gibbons’ solo record “Out Of Season” from a few years back than the first 2 Portishead records, but if you like Portishead, I think you’ll dig it.

The Dandy Warhols-Earth To The Dandy Warhols:

absolutely nothing new here, if you’ve heard older Dandy Warhols records, but they’re not as totally fucking stoned as they were last time they did a record, so this one’s pretty good. Consistently one of America’s best bands, but yeah, they were high last time, and they’re slightly less so here.

Rick Springfield-Venus In Overdrive:

God friggin’ bless Rick Springfield. That’s all I have to say here.

Coldplay-Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends:

“You know how I know you’re gay?” Yep. Good record.

Amanda Palmer-Who Killed Amanda Palmer?:

Amanda’s really coming into her own as an artist. This is some good stuff, whether you’re a Dresden Dolls fan or not. I’m in the “sorta” column, personally, having enjoyed them a bunch live, but not being someone who listens to them casually all that often. This record, though, really well put together, an easy listen, and one of those albums where you look up from what you’re doing every so often and think “Wow.”

Honorable mention:

Tom Jones’ “24 Hours” is a bit uneven, but when it hits (like on the opening “I’m Alive” and “The Hitter”), it KILLS.

Enjoy, and feel free to leave your own picks/suggestions/opinions in the comments.

Is it cheating if they’re dead? The person you’re cheating with, not the person you’re dating/married to.

No, not because of my last post. I’ll let you guys worry about me for that one. The reason why I’m worrying about myself is that, despite loving the movie “Superbad” and liking him in whatever else I’ve seen him in, I haven’t been able to remember Jonah Hill’s name for about a month. It’s one of those things that drives me nuts when I’m thinking in the car, seriously. I forget other things too, but this one’s monumental. I’m probably going to post about other things I can’t remember, as I realize I habitually can’t remember them, just to keep a running tab. I blame the migraines. They kill your brain cells, son! They kill your brain cells!

If I may be wildly inappropriate for a moment…am I the only person who thinks “Freeway Of Love” by Aretha Franklin is about Aretha Franklin having anal sex? Giving or receiving, it matters not. These are the sort of thoughts that trouble me in the wee hours of the moment. Believe me, it’s not that I want to think about Aretha Franklin having anal sex. Not that there’s anything wrong with her or nothin’, I just don’t. It’s just that the song sounds like it was recorded to conjure imagery of anal sex, specifically anal sex involving Aretha Franklin in some way, shape or form. I don’t think this is the only case of this in popular music. At times, I’ve thought that every Doobie Brothers song is about anal sex, possibly but not definitely involving Michael McDonald, but I’m not sure about that one like I am about “Freeway Of Love”.

Please help me.

For those who haven’t read the other obits today, Dock Ellis died of liver disease yesterday at the age of 63. Dock was a pitcher with the Pirates, Yankees, Athletics, Rangers and Mets over a 12 year big league career, but with Dock, while he had decent numbers, there was always way more to him than the numbers. He was at one point the most feared pitcher in the major leagues, an outspoken critic of whatever pissed him off at the time, and unfortunately, as great as his legend has become from throwing a no-hitter while on LSD (June 12th, 1970; one of the only cool “this date in history” things to happen on my birthday), he was a drug user, and his ballplaying career and in all likelihood, his life were cut short by the damage he did to himself with drug abuse. Dock recognized this, though, and he did his best to make peace with it and make amends in his later years, becoming a drug counselor who worked with everyone from his fellow ballplayers to prison inmates. He also had a cameo in the Michael Keaton epic Gung-Ho, and was also the co-author of Dock Ellis In The Country Of Baseball, a biography of Ellis co-written with future Poet Laureate Donald Hall. Dock lived a full, complex, interesting life that, as full as it was, was also entirely too short. Pretty much anyone who knew Dock describes him as the real deal, a larger-than-life, yet down to Earth figure who talked straight, admitted his failings, treated the people he met like neighbors and family, but never took shit from anyone. I really regret not getting a chance to meet the dude. He seems like someone whose company I would’ve enjoyed.

The best article I’ve read on Dock to date is here. I hope that you enjoy it as much as I have.

I’m a little crazy when it comes to shopping.

No, not in the “buy everything in sight” kind of way. It’s more that I spend a disproportionate amount of time, energy and thought absorbing my shopping experience while I’m out in the big blue room. I notice everything from personality of employees to store layout to pricing to ambient noise in the store, temperature of the store, whether they’re obviously copying another store’s successful ideas, you name it. I’d be an ideal secret shopper, save for the fact that the secret shopper business is one big scam and after seriously looking into it, I wouldn’t touch traditional secret shopper employment with a ten foot pole. I would, on the other hand, be open to doing consulting for some retail businesses, in the right situation.

Here are some things I’ve noticed over time about chain stores I’ve been to:

• You can almost tell, nowadays, if a chain’s going to be going tits-up by the vibe of the store when you’re in it. Linens And Things, Circuit City and Kay-Bee Toys all had “the vibe”, which to me, consists of a retail environment totally detached from the reality of shopping. Either the employee vibe is vacant (Circuit City), the layout of the store is so obtuse that it makes visits to the store maddening (Linens And Things, which copied all the wrong things about Bed, Bath and Beyond), or the place is just hostile either in their pricing or their customer relations (Kay-Bee). Some other stores that aren’t out yet, but possess “the vibe” are Men’s Wearhouse (like Kay-Bee, they’re hostile in both their pricing and their customer relations), Borders (there’s something about Borders locations, which used to be fantastic, that screams “also-ran” nowadays), R&S Strauss Auto Parts (totally lost in the woods), Sears and K-Mart (This could’ve been the merger of all mergers if anyone at either company could’ve put their egos aside; instead, it’s a sad clusterfuck of two stores struggling for identity and market share. It’s especially sad for Sears, because I was in one this month, and they’re *thisclose* to being an enjoyable department store, a true rarity…). Whether my opinion of these stores jibes with business realities, I’m not sure, but I know the gut feeling I’ve gotten and get with these places.
• Some stores are just too evil to die. I’m looking at you, Marshall’s. Marshall’s has consistently been the worst retail experience of any store I’ve been to, and I try to avoid it like the plague, but get dragged in there by people periodically. Literally, for 20 years, it’s sucked. Lighting’s horrible, store layout is a mess, it’s always too hot in the store no matter what time of year it is, and they sell nothing but crap, yet they perservere and will continue to perservere, because they’re too evil not to. I think Marshall’s is even more evil than Wal-Mart, personally. Even seeing their logo makes me hate my life.
• Wanna watch some twentysomethings look really confused? Go into the Apple Store and pay cash for something. They look at you like you’re trying to hand them a kiwi to pay for your stuff. It’s awesome.
• Strangely, I like Best Buy. A lot of people I know can’t stand it, but at the one nearest to me, the employees are friendly without being obnoxious or pushy, they’ll give you a straight answer about what is or isn’t in the stockroom, and returns are never a problem (which runs counter to most of their locations, from what I hear). I don’t think all the Best Buy employees at my “local” like me, especially since Rock Band 2 came out (Hey, not my fault that they leave the mic out!), but they’re polite enough and they’ll give a brother a straight answer.
• Unless you find something on sale for a really good price, chains like Foot Locker and Modell’s are no place to go to shop for running gear. It’s not that the prices and/or selection aren’t there (that’s a mixed bag, seasonal, really). It’s more that the folks at the local stores (McLoone’s Running Store and Shore Runner are my locals) tend not only to really know their shit, but they’ll also talk to you about it at considerable length, no matter what your level of experience. I imagine that at some of these places, you’ll get a “record store clerk” vibe from the help, but more often than not, I hear about local running stores being your best bet, and my experiences so far have lined up with what I’ve heard. I think Foot Locker and Modell’s both mean well to some degree or another, but for running, go local.
• Never try to ask a GameStop employee if they have a game in another store (their inventory management is so fucked up that no one knows), or if they’ve actually played any game that falls even slightly outside the realm of “popular”. For shits and giggles, I asked one if they’d played either of EA’s Arena Football games, and if so, whether one was better than the other. It was as if their ability to form a sentence DISAPPEARED when I did this. Now, I know that Arena Football isn’t exactly white-hot or anything, but I worked at a game store for close to 3 years, and you can bet your ass I would’ve tried it out. I tried everything out. There’s a lot of downtime in a game store, especially during non-holiday times.
• In general, not enough chains train their staff to do what I think is the most important thing a business of any kind can do, which is to make their customers feel like they’re part of the experience, rather than making them feel like cattle with credit cards. Best Buy, at least my local one, is close. The Apple Store thinks they have this down, but they skew the experience toward first-time buyers far too much. Hot Topic would actually do OK on this front if they’d turn the Dragonforce CDs down just a smidge (Jesus, listen to me. “Turn down that power metal! Hey, you lesbians! Get off my lawn!”) and bring back the clearance t-shirt racks. (What’s up with that shit?) I’ve been saying this for quite a while, about advertising, about entertainment promotion, and it absolutely applies to retail as well: someone’s always going to undercut you on the price of goods or offer your customer base another compelling option for their money, so you have to focus on services, and within the context of those services, make your customers feel included. I just can’t stress this enough. It might not seem like the best way to move units, but it’ll build up brand loyalty that will last a long time. That’s worth way more than any one-time sale.

I was just driving home from dropping a package off at the post office, and as I went past a cemetery, some lady pulled out of its driveway a little too far. You know the type, they’ll pull halfway into the road without warning, and then get mad at you when you razz them for just about causing an accident. Anyway, when this happened, the following words left my mouth, without any forethought:

“Get the fuck back in the graveyard before I put you there!”

Thankfully, my window and hers were both rolled up when I said it.

And here some of you have been thinking that I’ve mellowed over the 12 years I’ve been on the Web. (12 years tomorrow, in fact.)

Been a bitch of a week on the sleep front (the later I wake up, the less of a chance I have to eat, digest, and still have time to run before dark), and my left leg still doesn’t feel right. I must’ve had a stress fracture when it was at its worst, but it’s still not healed totally, regardless. I hear that they’re long, annoying injuries to come back from. I’ll know more when I get my x-rays done, but I’ve gotta sort through a bunch of paperwork if I don’t want a few hundred more dollars tacked onto my list of “doctor bills I’m not that likely to pay”, and hospital charity care programs have gotten REALLY stingy in the past few years.

It’s frustrating, and I keep wondering if I’m just making excuses or something, even though I *want* to run.

Gonna rest this week, and start again with Week 2 on Monday, see how it goes.

Bah.

I know I don’t owe you guys any explanation, but most of why I started posting my running logs here was for accountability. I want y’all to stay on my ass and call me out on my bullshit if any arises. It’s not your responsibility, but it’s still something I’d appreciate.

Without splattering too much of his personal business all over my part of the ‘net, I can tell you all that things appear to have gone well with the surgery, and he’s getting rest. Thanks to all of you who sent good vibes his way, spoken or otherwise.

…to my friend George Tabb, who’s having surgery sometime today, if he hasn’t already. Get well soon, chief.

…and don’t always look at my sidebar:

My Amazon Wishlist

Only 23 items, and some of it’s actually useful to me! Anyone remember when I used to have 6 pages of crap and a Segway on my list? Clearly, I’ve either mellowed or I got the other 5 pages of crap. More likely the former, since I don’t think I have a Segway here. Yet.